Double Axe Handle or Don't Try This At Home

I helped Shandera move on Saturday.
Myself and Peter Russell.
This equals a conglomeration of dufuses who have known one another for too long.
I have seen Peter Russell's penis on multiple occasions.
Robert's as well.
Knowing men for the better part of your life does, however, afford certain oppurtunities.
So, it is still early on in the moving process.
A great deal of time before dismantling the hide-a-bed.
Robert is busying himself with something.
Peter and I are standing about, awaiting command.
Peter picks up a metal folding chair.
The sort that they use in wrestling matches on the television screen.
You get me? Okay.
Now, Peter's holding this chair.
And I'm watching him, discreetely, from the corner of my eye.
You have to watch Peter because who knows what he may do.
How do you think I've seen his penis so many times?
Anyway, he's holding the chair at arm's length in front of him, a leg in each hand.
This is where our knowing one another comes into play.
I know what he's going to do before he does it.
I continue to watch.
He scrutinizes the chair.
He hefts it in his hands, empirically judging the weight of it.
Then he hits himself in the face with it.
Now, his intention is to hit his brow, which is firm and resilient.
However, he accidently hits the bridge of his nose.
He then immediately doubles over, while holding both hands to his nasal cavity.
For the mother hens who say that wrestling is poor viewing for children, this is a point for their side.