"Which Oatcake is the Best?"

I know that the guy who said, 'The customer is always right,' is surely dead by now.
But I hope the fucker died of gangrene.
On his birthday.

Sarah Turpin is back in town, did I tell you?
Already my restless nights have increased in numeration.
We had to share my couch for an evening.
It was magical. She'll tell you about it.
Certain surfaces were never designed for two (count 'em, two) gangly people.