Don't Spend it all in One Place

And the angels said unto the Lord:
"With your grace this one should turn out okay."
And the Lord spake, saying:
"Huh? I'm sorry, I wasn't paying attention.
I was checking my Pro-Line.
What were we talking about?"
Thus Sarah Turpin was born.
Since I have no wherewithal.
And since my mother constantly reminds me (through tears) that:
"She's someone else's problem now."
I haven't festooned any sort of a present for her.
Then I remembered her narcissism.
Since it essentially imitates mine.
And I thought of what I always think of when I think of Sarah Turpin.
Myself.
And I asked myself:
"Self, what would I want for my birthday?"
To be mentioned in someone's blog.
Will that do?
Alright, good. I'm going to check my own Pro-Line.
Innevitably, Sidney Crosby has fucked me somehow.