Friends With Deficits

I bought a shirt with a Canadian flag on it.
Because Canada Day was weeks ago (probably).
So the shirt was on sale.
I buy all of my clothing from bins now.
It's my newest plan to fit in with the artsy crowd.
I've been reciting poetry at Bar None.
Nothin'.
Anyway, the shirt has a picture of the flag and underneath it says:
THESE COLOURS DON'T RUN
I just took it out of the dryer.
It turned all of my socks pink.
You get what you pay for, I guess.

I'm growing increasingly concerned that I'm about to find myself in a no-strings sexual relationship.
I'm the only person I know of who would be concerned about something like this.
In order to do this properly I'll have to appear sexually confident.
I've often wondered what it would be like to be sexually confident.
Hey, there's orange stuff on my wrist.
No, I'm serious.
Sort of looks like cheese.
Which is preposterous because I just got out of the shower.
I'm sure I'll be fine...

I played chess with Sobol yesterday.
Because she felt like losing at something.