It's Hallowe'en.
I don't have a costume.
I did have a few ideas that never came to fruition.
Unlike all of these ghoul, vampire motherfuckers that are out trick or treating tonight after school
I wanted to go as something that's actually scary.
Frightening.
So, I was going to dress up as grand economic decline.
But I was too lazy to make a line graph.
Then I thought I'd go as the general public.
But that's a costume with just too many elements.
I mean, do I dress up as the assholes who wear their sunglasses on the back of their heads?
Or the guys who drive Ford F250s and beat their wives?
Too many variables.
So, I might simplify.
I covered Mitch Hedberg at the Rose & Thistle last night.
And I wanted to straighten my hair for the occaison.
I made Turpin do it.
But we quickly realized it would take too long, and I was finding it too painful.
Among the many things that Turpin is not
(attractive; polite)
you can also add 'hairdresser' to the list.
But she did straighten half of it.
And left the other half as is.
Peter's blog might have pictures.
Anyway, she suggested I do the same thing tonight and go as 'fucking ugly.'
Unless I can find the old elephant costume, I may do that.
Listen to this, and then go put your pins and needles in your apples.
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