A Desert Session

If I ever found myself stranded in a desert somehow, I wouldn't even bother walking.
I wouldn't even try.

"Well, I'm doomed," I'd say to myself.

I guess I'd just sit down then and wait for death.

Which is what we're all sort of doing anyway.

But at least we get to watch the hockey game while we do it.

Not in the desert, though.

I wonder if I'd see a mirage.

A mirage is sort of like a (nearly) physical version of false hope.
So probably.
"Hey, is that an oasis! Oh wait. Nah. It's just a bus station."

Back to giving up, then.

Shooing away vultures.

"Not yet, jerks. You're worse than seagulls!"

Eventually I'd snap and run head-on into a nearby cactus over and over again until exhaustion.

Then one vulture would land beside me and say, "Not much to this guy."

And the other vulture would say, "Twelve o' clock and all's well!"

Anybody? Anybody...?So it looks like I'm confirmed to do comedy in Halifax next month.

That's a whole new staff of waitresses that I can embarrass myself in front of.

And pine over.

More to follow.