Pride Before the Fall

WARNING:

SHOULD NOT BE READ BY PREGNANT WOMEN OR OLD PEOPLE

Side note:

Have any of you had to show your genitals to a doctor?

Huh?

Wussthat?

Oh. Nothing.
Just curious. That's all.

You see those newlywed couples who get the pregnancy pictures taken?

Not photos of the baby.

Not photos of the baby being conceived.

Just photos of the woman in her third trimester.

He's in the photo, too.

In the background somewhere.

With a nice sweater on.

They're typically done in black and white.

First of all:

This is the most concrete example of a man relinquishing his dignity that I have seen so far.

Holding her purse while she tries on shoes isn't even in the same universe as this is.

If she made the man ingest the purse in the shoe store it still wouldn't be in the same league.

But I got to thinking...

Would they get miscarriage photos done as well?

Just have the two of them pose next to some nice birch trees.

With sad faces.
Their pockets turned inside out.

This is all Anne Geddes' fault.
If I was a millionaire, y'know what I'd do?

I'd rob an old folks' home.

Load thirty, forty elderly people into a truck.

Then I'd dress them up as daffodils and watermelons and bumblebees.

And then I'd set them loose on Anne Geddes' property.

She drugs all of those babies, by the way.
For those photos.
She tranquilizes all of them.