"I just called to say..."

Feist sort of looks like Natalie Webber.
Natalie Webber was the first woman I ever kissed.
Of course, she was four at the time...
And she'll never forget it!

I've got stories!

First of all, Avril, this human I was undressing, I'm still undressing.
So that's something to mention, I suppose.
We spent the weekend together eating my mother's frozen food.
At my mother's house.
Well, we'd thaw it first.
Turns out she enjoys eating Mom's groceries as much as I do.
We rented Deathproof and put Baily's in our coffee.
Dad's Baily's.
Well, not Dad's, really.
The company's at Christmas time.

When you move and flail like me, it's only rational to be wary.
I'm wary of table saws, for example.
Edges of cliffs.
I'm violently wary of edges of cliffs.
And dropping things into the toilet.
I first began wearing glasses in grade six.
I've been nervous about dropping a pair into the toilet ever since.
I had my closest toilet scare yet.
Mom's cordless phone.
I know, I know.
"Why did I have the phone in the bathroom?"
(Originally wrote this as: "Why did I have the toilet in the bathroom?")
Have you heard of Matthew Esteves?
He insists that if I need to speak to him, I have to call him from there.
And I had to call him the other day.
To tell him that he's too demanding of me.
Bounced off of the seat.
It was terrifying.
I gasped and everything.

Alright, I'm gonna break this into some other posts.
So it looks like I haven't neglected the blog as much as I actually have.



edit: Doesn't it seem like Stevie's verifying there's an audience before he starts?
This guy's a pro.