A Probable Fate

Turpin and I had supper at Pizza Delight Monday night.
We confused the waitress.
After I had her write down my order I said, "And can you ask them to spit in it?"
When we first arrived she asked, "For two?"
I said yes, but at separate tables.
Turpin also said something witty here but I can't remember what it was.
Because I can only follow my own dialogue.
Anyway.
Nothin'.
The waitress wasn't going for any of it.

Turpin and I are entirely aware that we are romantically involved in other universes.
We have the sort of relationship where we can talk about that and it's not weird.
I suggested that in one of them we probably got together immediately after her moving to Bay Roberts.
(In this universe) She showed me Calvin and Hobbes cartoons from a book.
Far from our first meeting, this would have been our first 'hang out' together.
She suggested that (in this universe) we could have a Calvin and Hobbes-themed wedding.
"They could be the place-setting on the cake," she added.
I said that we could have two people dressed as mascot-sized Calvin and Hobbeses, walking around at the reception.
Then she suggested that we could be dressed like that.
"That'd be great," I realized, "Because we wouldn't have to talk to anybody because of the giant heads."
Yes, we're a happy couple out there somewhere.
"How many of these universes do you suppose we commit suicide in?" She asked me.
"All of them," I replied.

edit: This comic has no metaphorical significance.
It's the first one I came across that I laughed at.