Writing on the Wall

'Biblical proportions' is just another way of saying 'highly unlikely.'

I vomited early on Sunday morning.
That was the only day this weekend, though.
I drank four beers.
One bottle and three pints.
"So, really you drank six beers.
Cause a pint is like a beer and a half.
Seven beers."
Robert explained this to me yesterday while dogs frolicked around us.
Robert's good at math.
The important thing to realize here is that after vomiting, Avril brought me saltines.

While walking through the mall's skywalk, I noticed that someone had written the following on a support beam:
JESSIE IS THE BEST THING TO EVER HAPPEN TO ME!!
I wrote underneath it:
It won't last.

Speaking of damned relationships, mom and dad recently observed their fortieth anniversary.
I wasn't there.
And I forgot to call.
But it still happened, just the same.