I take baths in Palmolive so's I don't get wrinkly.
If you let your newborn suck on its feet, it may result in an eventual foot fetish.
Speaking of feet, they're gross.
I hate feet.
I hate your feet, I hate my feet, and I hate yer mudder's feet.
I hate feet.
They're functional, sure.
But so are scrotums.
You don't see people at the mall paying Koreans to buff and shine them.
You go to Korea for that.
If it makes you feel any better, I believe that I have the grossest feet out of everyone.
Turpin's are a close second.
You know those people who say they're creationists?
"The finches are as they are because God wants them to be."
Creationists want their children to learn that animals showed up on a giant boat with an old man.
In schools.
They want this taught in schools.
If you're a creationist, and you occasionally pick things up off of the floor with your toes, doesn't that make you an asshole?
Think about it.
Speaking of not needing education, I'm going to practice Pink Floyd's 'The Wall.'
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
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2010
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June
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- A Deep Clean
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- I'm Taken
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- On the Job
- Allow me a Moment to Stripe
- The Wrong Foot
- Losing Their Grip
- "Extra, Extra! Narcissist Writes About Himself!"
- Will Dust 'Til Dawn
- A Band-Aid Solution
- Writing on the Wall
- Three's Company
- A Little Meat on Their Bones
- I Beg Your Pardon
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June
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4 comments:
Sarah disagrees with your depiction of her. She says it looks more like your Mom. I concur. At least one of the reasons I concur is because she is my wife. Sarah, I mean. Not your mom.
Fucking creationists. God should kill those bastards, because thats what we were created for. Dying. Funny I should read about you learning Floyd while I'm listening to them.
DON'T TELL LINDA I SAID THAT!
(And don't tell her I called her by her first name, either).
Seriously.
I believe that I have used photos of Sam the Eagle for Turpin before.
I find the resemblance shocking.
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