"I Don't Wanna Fight"

My brother is in the province right now.
He's asleep.
And he's six and a half hours away.
Brian and I had what you might call a tumultuous relationship as children.
'Tumultuous' like Ike and Tina Turner's.
Guess which one I was.
I hold no ill will towards him now.
Because mom won't let me.
It was a part of the growing process.
It was meant to toughen me up, I'm sure.
It didn't work, but I don't blame him for that either.
I blame all of those sissy books I used to read as a kid.
If I'd only read a bare minimum I'd probably be some big hockey star by now.
Instead of writing this blog I'd be banging women and endorsing things.
And you'd all have to find something else to do at work.