I Know What You're Thinkin'

I bought the majority of the gifts that I need to buy yesterday.
There was a wooden train for Tommy.
And a little doll for Susie.
And a bottle of Peppermint Schnapps for Tommy and Susie's divorcee mom.
I can't wait to see their faces when they open them.

Y'know what bothers me about humans and telepathy?
They won't even entertain the possibility of being able to communicate
Without using sounds or movements.
(Like shouting, or semaphore).
I'm not referring to this-'I'm thinking of a number between one and another one.
What is it?"
-Hocup pocus garbage.
Mathematics are so impersonal.
I was in the shower ("Oh, here it comes") and I was thinking of a non-event.
I was picturing Turpin and I in a room with Colin.
Which has happened before.
But there's no bottle of peppermint schnapps this time.
Anyway, Turpin is telling Colin stories about her various lovers.
Disfigured and unbalanced as they are.
And I want her to tell him the story about that guy who bought her a teak table.
After knowing her for some short period of time.
While she was in B.C., and therefore eventually travelling.
A teak table.
And I say to her (I'm still in the shower, imagining all of this):
"Tell Colin the story about that guy."
Which is how I would say it to her.
And she'd piss and fiddle about, acting like she doesn't know which guy I'm talking about.
THOUGH SHE TOTALLY DOES BECAUSE WE'RE SOUL MATES.
So, I just look her in the eye, say nothing, and repeat, "Teak table teak table teak table."
Over and over again in my head.
That's where this deranged fantasy ended.
Because I then started thinking about writing this post.
This is how my brain works.
Personally, I think that if this were really happening, she would figure it out.
And why is that so far-fetched?
Every generation, humanity believes that they know everything.

4th Century
"Well, someone wrote the Kama Sutra, and we have invented the trebuchet.
Nothing can stop us now."

[Time Passes]

8th Century
"Well, we've invented the harp.
And horseshoes.
Angels have something to play.
And horses have something to wear on their feet.
Nothing can stop us now."

[Time Passes]

11th Century
"Well, we've invented the magnifying glass and the hypodermic needle.
Now people can pass on AIDS to one another.
As soon as someone starts banging monkeys-
Like that would ever happen!"
[Resounding laughter]
"Yes lads, nothing can stop us now."

[Time Passes]

18th Century
"Well, we've invented the steamboat, and Napolean's boys found The Rosetta Stone.
We'd try and take it from him, but he has so many damned trebuchets.
Regardless, nothing can stop us now."

[Times Passes]

20th Century
"We've invented Blogger.com and the Furbee.
Yes, we've finally done it.
Nothing can stop us now."

This joke ran away with itself.
These people of the past all seem so old.
But, it's important to realize that we're already as old as they are.
Of course, these are all inventions, and I'm talking about a (meta?)biological thing.
But if we have figured out how to fight static cling.
I don't see why we can't be telepathic as well.