Babies Babies Everywhere, So Let's All Have A Drink

My favourite season is the day that winter ends.
This year, that day was yesterday.
To celebrate, I put on a shirt with long sleeves and went for a walk.
Tried to discover where women sunbathe in this stink town.
You can cross the mall off of the list.
They're not there.

All advertising is false.

I have a note in my book that says:
"Talk about the babies, fuckhead."
So, I suppose I should do that.
This is how I communicate with myself, by the way.
I sometimes forget that newcomers may be reading these posts.
People who have never seen my friends, their vaginas, or the babies who've come out of them.
Victoria Mary Elizabeth Shandera was born the day I moved to Halifax.
She has Robert's mouth and Christa's gender.
She can sort of hold up her head on her own at this point.
She's keen to acheive, just like her daddy.
She will do well in school, and she'll probably never use hard drugs.

Rowan Adventure Turpin/Russell was born New Year's Eve last year.
From a legal drinking age standpoint (which will one day be important to Rowan, I'm sure) it's the worst birthday possible.
Much like Victoria, Rowan looks like a little baby.
I tell her about my girl problems sometimes, after her mom leaves the room
("And don't even get me started on your mother...").
I think about discussing with 15-year old Rowan what a pain in the ass baby Rowan was.
Though strange, it's an oddly exciting prospect.
It is also...humbling?
Not humbling.
It's a concept with so many potentials.
Who will I be by then?
More importantly, who will she be?
How many ex-wives will I have?
To dwell on their future is to dwell on my own.
They are a new perspective for me.
A new avenue for clarity and self-discovery.
These are the first since-birth friends I've ever had.
Before them, the closest candidates were their parents.
They are important.
...
See?
It is different when they're yours.

And let's not forget about the biological niece on the way.
I forget all of the time.
Sure, this is the sort of thing that should resonate with me.
But I tend to forget things that aren't right in front of me-
"My eye appointment was supposed to be two months ago!"-
A new generation of Warford, I can't help but wonder how her nose will turn out.
I'm just waiting for the day I can sneak her booze during some family wedding
(My fourth, for example).
Promising her I won't tell her father, I'll mention and laugh about it with Brian immediately.
Yes, there are a lot of new lies on the horizon.
Brian has an uncanny knack for turning something general into something that is him.
So he should find this easy enough.