I Like The Way You Move

Alright, alright.
Stay the slings and spare the arrows.
I haven't been writing not because I haven't been writing.
I just haven't been writing.
I have been writing.
I've just been distancing myself from my laptop.
It was nice outside.
I've also been renting cars and driving places.
But I'm back and saucy!
So pull up a cubicle and-
That woman is carrying a bicycle tire into the coffee shop.
Some people will do just about anything for attention.
Write a blog, for example.

Alright.
Okay.
Alright.

Written on...we'll say March 20th:

I went to PEI over the weekend.
Spent a lot of a paycheck that I haven't received yet (still haven't received it) to get there.
Despite the company of Andie, my PEI-born co-pilot, we managed to get lost twice.
My favourite part was when she suddenly asked, "Are we in New Brunswick?!"
I didn't know.
But I knew that the bilingual roadsigns weren't encouraging.
Choosing the most mysterious-looking garage we could find, we stopped for directions.
But all we found were several dogs and no humans.
Dogs don't talk, so I chose to call the hotel people.
Speaking of, if you ever find yourself in PEI--
"Whadya mean 'Rainbow Valley is closed!?'"--
stay at The Delta.
They treated me wicked nice.
The guy with the cute accent was very supportive when I lost the keys to the rental car.
Push-button start allows rubes like me to lose their keys immediately after parking.
Do you guys think I'm calm, generally speaking?

Yesterday, I tried to conclude this post by describing how the show in PEI went.
But I hated everything I wrote down when I tried that.
So we're moving on.
If you could choose any musical act to help you move out of your apartment, who would you choose?
This question seems like a more worthwhile exploitation of your (my?) time.
I've discovered that I really enjoy asking hypothetical questions.
I got into the practice with my roommate, Kyle.
Here's a photo of him looking grosser than he actually is:

However, since we're both six, most questions tend to be disgusting and/or involve sex with Natalie Portman.
A professional interviewer, Chuck Klosterman is great with hypotheticals.
He was aware enough of this talent to publish flash cards.
He asks the sort of things that I believe adults should be debating.
I'd discuss being Bruce Springsteen over politics any day. 
Oh, and I'd have sex with Natalie Portman, by the way.
In almost any scenario you can think of.
You hear me, Natalie?!
I'm right here waiting.
...For you.
Oh, that's a fun song that exists even though I forgot about it.
Let's stick that in here.


Will you leave comments on which musicians would help you move?
Give me something to fill my day?
I said Slipknot because there are, like, nine guys in that band.
So, they could do most of the work.
While I made the lemonade.
"Maybe you'd have an easier time drinking this if you took off the masks, fellas."

edit: Reading an alphabetical list of Ice Cube's tracks is pretty fun.