Sunday, July 22, 2007

100 Idiots

Okay, this is killing me. It's starting to feel as though the post regarding the White Stripes is a homework assignment that is now late. I'll make the retelling as abridged as possible so that we can all quickly move on with our lives:

Shandera, Tracey and I hit up George Street at 4pm after hearing rumours that the famous pair would be playing a 'secret show' there at that time.
They had played a secret show in a random location in every city on the tour so far.
We waited. People milled about.
A rumour within a rumour was overheard, and it was believed that the Stripes were setting up at The Ship (a prediction I myself had made earlier that day. I was very proud of myself).
A group of 100 idiots began running towards the location. We followed.
Halfway there, all turned around because the rumour was false.
We waited. Again.
It began to rain (a lot).
An Evening Telegram car pulled onto the street. People mingled around the car and one mingler began whispering to nearby people, and that whispering then spiderwebed.
Soon, everyone was running again. This time, we watched.
As soon as the crowd of 100 idiots began to run down the street, two telegram correspondents emerged from their car and began taking pictures.
I was pissed because it certainly seemed like a sneaky trick had been played on a mass of youths for the sake of a photo op. The crowd returned soon afterwards.
German Diedre emerged from Bridey's. She asked if we were going to the show. We said 'yes', and explained that we had an extra ticket. She offered to purchase it, and then she asked for my number A SECOND TIME.
The Telegram car returned. I informed our little circle that I was going to go tell the Telegram correspondent that she was an asshole for playing a large group of people for chumps. Here is a photo of me doing that:
She denied the whole thing, but she was likely lying. Either way, it felt good to stick it to someone.
Diedre agreed to meet up with us later for the show, and I began questioning whether or not this was a date, in my head.
5:15. Shandera's patience has run out. So has mine, really. Much of the crowd was of the same opinion. People badmouthed Jack White as we began to exit the street. How come no one ever badmouths Meg? They're a duo, aren't they? We left. Tracey stayed.
5:30. Tracey called to tell us that they're setting up, but she'd heard rumours that it was only going to be a one-note show.
I told her that there's no way they'd do that, and then I told her to take pictures, as we were not turning around.
They did play a one-note show. Jack White's ego could topple nations. The CBC will tell you more.
We arrived early because I was with Shandera. We sat and soon Pete showed. We sat some more. We were in the front row. I kept an eye out for D.
She eventually showed. She was drunk and immediately suggested we get a beer. While doing so, she saw a guy with a ridiculous looking mohawk and claimed it looked hot. I disagreed.
She began talking to some fellow who I would've been intimidated by, were he more attractive. She introduced me by the wrong name, so the date was going pretty well. I decided at that point to put far less effort into trying to impress her.
We sat for perhaps 2 minutes before she mentioned that she wanted to hop over the boards and go to the floor. There were ushers on either side of us. I get caught when I try to be rebellious. She did not know this, but I knew this.
I told her that perhaps we should wait. She didn't wait. Instead, she simply bolted.
She then goaded me from the floor, a few feet away, and motioned for me to hurry up. I didn't want to get kicked out before the show even started. I figured that this is what would happen.
I surprised myself and clamored over the boards without being spotted. She then took my hand and led me through the crowd. I felt as though I was on the set of Can't Hardly Wait.
We were one of those couples; those who elbow everyone else out of the way in order to get closer to the stage. I generally hate those people. She was turning me into one of those people. I followed her regardless because I guess I was still trying to impress her after all.
She then asked to get onto my shoulders so that she could take pictures. She is very petite, but she still didn't realize what she was asking me to do. I hesitantly crouched. I truly believed I was about to kill her. Well, specifically, I believed the stadium floor was going to kill her when she landed on it after I dropped her.
I surprised myself again and managed to keep her upright - luckily for her.
She proceeded to rock out. She complained that the crowd was 'too boring.' She shook her head and shouted "This is sad" after each song.
I tried to keep up. I admit that the crowd was a little lax, but it was the White Stripes. They're not exactly Cannibal Corpse.
They proved to be very deadly and soon the show ended.
We exited and parted ways. I worried that Diedre wasn't going to give me Peter's money for his ticket. I had to push the issue a little before she left.
I then elected to not drink and to go home instead (at 11). Diedre wasn't impressed with me, but at the end of the day, I wasn't entirely impressed with Diedre. Though she was very cute, and probably wild in bed because she's German, as though that's something I'm looking for.
Anyway, I went home and continued being boring.

2 comments:

trac54 said...

No offence but I don't think you are boring at all.

No offence I don't think German kid is cute.

No offence but the crowd was insane where I was

Also, you are great.
I'm sad that you didn't go all out on the White Stripes journal.

:)

Jane said...

I disagree with your comment about Jack White's ego. Fans were fully warned that it was going to be a one note show. (see the forum in www.whitestripes.net) As well - it was pretty darn memorable...who can ever forget that? I personally laughed and laughed...what a hilarious thing to do. Also, I haven't told you this yet...but I met Jack White in Antigonish. He was very pleasant.

Interesting little blog you've got here. I must be exceptionally bored here at work today, as I read the whole thing. Well, mostly. You can be wordy, you know, ha. Interesting escapades with chums new and old eh........

You may want to reconsider your spelling of awkward. Just a thought. As well, I'd previously mentioned your fixation with one 'p' apparently(s). I see my advice has gone disregarded, haha.

Hope you have fun at Brian's wedding; all the best to him, Andrea, and the rest of the family. I would have just written this directly to you, but you're not online. Way to go, champ.

This is a long 'comment.' Evidently, I can be quite wordy as well.

Talk soon, yes? As usual, m&l you.

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